She: "I drank last night. I know gave it up for Lent, but this was a work situation!" Me: "So Lent goes one day longer for you?" She: "Yeah, I suppose so." She B: "Well Ladies, I think I'll take up drinking for Lent." Me: "Oooooh, I like the idea of doing something rather than
He: "Do you remember that film Logan's Run? It was a lot like Blade Runner, I thought." Me: "How can you even draw comparisons between the two? Logan's Run was a shallow romp whereas Blade Runner was a dark vision of the future. And the women in Logan's Run? All one dimensional. They were at
He: "I'll bet you a donut that it won't get done." Me: "I'll see your donut and raise you a bundt cake." He: "See, that just illustrates the difference between a Grade 12 and Grade 14 employee..." Me: "What, the number of calories I'm willing to wager?" She: "This is moot, since I don't want
Me (picking up phone): "Hello?" She: "Hi, I have a problem. Someone brought me a piece of chocolate cake and I'm trying sooooo hard to be good. Do you want it?" Me: "No, but I give you permission to throw it in the trash." She: "What? I can't do that!" Me: "Yes you can. I
She B: "Yeah, my friend's former babysitter was in the play. She had a redundant role on Doogie Howser." Me: "What's that like, a redundant role?" She: "She could only say one line over and over!" Me: "For the entire series? Cool..." She (straight): "Roll-up your sleeve." Me: "But she could say it several different
She: "We need to get on the same page...heh, we need to agree on the same book! I'm not sure we've done that." Me: "The book's not the real problem. First, we have to meet in the library!"
Me: "Damn..." They: "What?" Me: "I can't remember why I left my office." He: "Yeah, that happens to me sometimes." Me: "No, really. I can't remember." He B: "Bathroom?" Me: "I think I would know that, but thanks for the thought."
Me (whispering): "Sorry, I've lost my voice. I won't be saying much at this meeting." He (whispering): "That's okay. I'll try to do most of the talking. Now, the first agenda item..." Me (whispering): "Excuse me, but I have to whisper. You can talk normally." He: "Oh, oh right. Right!"
Me: "I finished my performance reviews! Whoo-hoo! How're you doing?" He: "I asked for an extension. God, I hate doing these things." Me: "Me, too. It ranks up there with dental work and taxes." He: "But do you find you've been highly productive in other areas? I've gotten a lot of other things done." Me:
Me: "Did I tell you I canceled my cable?" She: "Ummmm, yes. Why? Why did you do it?" Me: "I went home last night and the only thing on T.V. was Top Gun. I was forced to watch Top Gun for entertainment." SQUeeeeeeeee Girl: "But what's wrong with that? I like Top Gun! It was
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