He: “It’s a Japanese cucumber.”<\/p>\n
Security Guard: “Yes, I can see that.”<\/p>\n
He: “Well, what’s the problem?”<\/p>\n
Security Guard: “It could be used as a weapon.”<\/p>\n
He: “What?”<\/p>\n
Security Guard: “You could bludgeon someone with it.”<\/p>\n
He: “Well, break it in half! I plan on eating it anyway.”<\/p>\n
Security Guard: “Sir, I’m going to ask my supervisor what to do with this.”<\/p>\n
Me: “Hmmmmm.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
He: “It’s a Japanese cucumber.” Security Guard: “Yes, I can see that.” He: “Well, what’s the problem?” Security Guard: “It could be used as a weapon.” He: “What?” Security Guard: “You could bludgeon someone with it.” He: “Well, break it in half! I plan on eating it anyway.” Security Guard: “Sir, I’m going to ask<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[65],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4249","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-news"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/steepedinthelore.bitingreviews.com\/steeped\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4249","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/steepedinthelore.bitingreviews.com\/steeped\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/steepedinthelore.bitingreviews.com\/steeped\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/steepedinthelore.bitingreviews.com\/steeped\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/steepedinthelore.bitingreviews.com\/steeped\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4249"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/steepedinthelore.bitingreviews.com\/steeped\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4249\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/steepedinthelore.bitingreviews.com\/steeped\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4249"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/steepedinthelore.bitingreviews.com\/steeped\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4249"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/steepedinthelore.bitingreviews.com\/steeped\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4249"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}