Every great Friday night out with the girls begs some comparison to the fearsome foursome of Sex and the City. Who’s quiet Charlotte, the girl who believes in love? Who’s cynical Miranda? Who’s hot, hot, hot for sex like Samantha? And who’s Carrie? We passed this phase after a few martinis and settled into the real topic of conversation: men. Unfortunately, this had dire consequences so close to the election…

She: “I should never, under any circumstances, be allowed to speak to men.”

Me: “Why?”

She: “I always say the wrong thing! I can’t talk to them! I’m giving up…”

Me: “You can’t give up! Maybe you should channel Carrie when you speak.”

She: “Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!”

Me: “What?”

She (sputtering): “Why? Why…would I channel Kerry?!”

Me: “Carrie? Because Carrie gets the guys.”

She: “Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww! I’m gonna vote for him, but no! NO, NO, NO!”

Me: “Carrie. Carrie Bradshaw. Sex and the City. What in the hell did you think I was talking about?”

She: “Oh, no. It’s worse than I thought!”

Me: “What?”

She: “I can’t talk to women, either.”

Me: “Oh. Have another drink.”