The Opening Ceremonies…or how a doobie can bring nations together
She: "Are you really watching the Olympics? I didn't realize everyone was so patriotic." She2: "Yeah, we're into it." Me: "But it's not about patriotism, really. It's just that it's one of the few, if only, global ceremonies we have." She: "I guess so..." She2: "We talked about this earlier.
Threshold
He: "I like your shoes. Those are really great." Me: "Thanks! Ask me how much I paid for them. Seriously." He2: "Don't do that! God, since you've been married you're so into the shoes, the clothes, the styles..." Me: "Hey, leave him alone. He dresses much better now. I, for
In the dark
He: "My boss wanted me to let your folks know when I'd be out in case something happens." Me: "That's fine except you left one of them off the distribution list." He: "I find it's best to keep at least one employee in the dark at all times." Me: "Because
Detente
Me: "Okay, I'm going to lay out this plan and THEN you can poke as many holes in it as you want." Emp 1: "Yes, but I have questions about how we're going to handle..." Me: "No, no. I said I'd lay the plan out FIRST, and then you can
Hey, Child of August!
DSW. The Gap. Anne Taylor. Tequila Roadhouse. I've already received birthday greetings from them all. Happy Birthday, come and shop! Happy Birthday, come and drink! Hey, Child of August, we love you for having a birthday, come and give us your money!!! My birthday isn't for another three weeks, and
Opposites Attract
Me: "So, what do you do for fun and excitement?" He: "You mean besides leading a life of crime?" Me: "Wait! You lead a life of crime? In my spare time, I fight crime." He: "They say opposites attract. What kind of crime do you fight?" Me: "Petty thugs...I bust
