She: “Look over there…I spy the president and at least two senior VP’s.”
Me: “What? In our cafeteria?”
She: “Don’t you remember? The dining room is under construction.”
Me: “I don’t want to see them eat. I’m uncomfortable with managerial mastication.”
She: “Wow…I didn’t know they could chew.”
Me: “I heard they don’t have time to chew. Their admin assistants pre-chew their food for them — saves time on nutrient absorption.”
She: “Ewwww!”
Me: “And later, they get injections of preservatives. Gives ’em a nice leathery appearance.”
She: “Ewwww!”
Me: “They shouldn’t eat out here with the rest of us mere mortals. We’ll get a complex.”
