Me: “Okay, I’m going to lay out this plan and THEN you can poke as many holes in it as you want.”

Emp 1: “Yes, but I have questions about how we’re going to handle…”

Me: “No, no. I said I’d lay the plan out FIRST, and then you can poke.”

Me (to Emp 2): “Didn’t I say I’d lay out the plan first?”

Emp 3: “You can’t ask her — she’s Switzerland.”

Emp 2: “That’s true. I stay out of these conflicts.”

Emp 3: “Let’s see. She’s Switzerland, I’m Europe and you’re America.”

Me (to Emp 1): “I guess that makes you the Middle East.”

Emp 1: “That’s not nice.”

Me: “Who said America was nice?”