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Repetitive

She B: "Yeah, my friend's former babysitter was in the play. She had a redundant role on Doogie Howser." Me: "What's that like, a redundant role?" She: "She could only say one line over and over!" Me: "For the entire series? Cool..." She (straight): "Roll-up your sleeve." Me: "But she could say it several different

By |2004-02-09T19:56:00+00:00February 9th, 2004|Legacy|Comments Off on Repetitive

Literals

She: "We need to get on the same page...heh, we need to agree on the same book! I'm not sure we've done that." Me: "The book's not the real problem. First, we have to meet in the library!"

By |2004-02-06T21:35:00+00:00February 6th, 2004|Legacy|Comments Off on Literals

Blank

Me: "Damn..." They: "What?" Me: "I can't remember why I left my office." He: "Yeah, that happens to me sometimes." Me: "No, really. I can't remember." He B: "Bathroom?" Me: "I think I would know that, but thanks for the thought."

By |2004-01-29T21:47:00+00:00January 29th, 2004|Legacy|Comments Off on Blank

Side Effects

Me (whispering): "Sorry, I've lost my voice. I won't be saying much at this meeting." He (whispering): "That's okay. I'll try to do most of the talking. Now, the first agenda item..." Me (whispering): "Excuse me, but I have to whisper. You can talk normally." He: "Oh, oh right. Right!"

By |2004-01-29T16:26:00+00:00January 29th, 2004|Legacy|Comments Off on Side Effects

Reviews

Me: "I finished my performance reviews! Whoo-hoo! How're you doing?" He: "I asked for an extension. God, I hate doing these things." Me: "Me, too. It ranks up there with dental work and taxes." He: "But do you find you've been highly productive in other areas? I've gotten a lot of other things done." Me:

By |2004-01-23T22:56:00+00:00January 23rd, 2004|Legacy|Comments Off on Reviews

SQUeeeeeeeee Girl

Me: "Did I tell you I canceled my cable?" She: "Ummmm, yes. Why? Why did you do it?" Me: "I went home last night and the only thing on T.V. was Top Gun. I was forced to watch Top Gun for entertainment." SQUeeeeeeeee Girl: "But what's wrong with that? I like Top Gun! It was

By |2004-01-23T19:42:00+00:00January 23rd, 2004|Legacy|Comments Off on SQUeeeeeeeee Girl

Measuring Urgency

She: "Can you let me know when you'll have this done?" Me: "What's your drop-dead date for this project?" She: "Yesterday." Me: "Sorry, I don't think we'll be able to meet that deadline. Really, how urgent is this?" She: "Well, my manager wants it done." Me: "Is it pee in your pants urgent or..." She:

By |2004-01-22T17:45:00+00:00January 22nd, 2004|Legacy|Comments Off on Measuring Urgency

A Game of Alias

Ping: "Season One was fantastic!" Pong: "Oh, and so was Season Two!" Net: "..." Ping: "I thought they lost their way this last season..." Pong: "Yes, but that last episode!" Net: "..." Ping: "Ohmygod! That was so GOOD!" Pong: "I know! I couldn't wait to see it again!!" Net: "..." Ping & Pong: "SQuuuuueeeeeeeeeeeee!!!" Net:

By |2004-01-21T04:18:00+00:00January 21st, 2004|Legacy|Comments Off on A Game of Alias

AWAD

She: "I almost put a word a day on my blog." Me: "Really? What was it?" She: "Flurry." Me: "Ah, don't you think people would already know what it means?" She: "I wanted to put it on there because it's fun to say!" Me: "Flurry! Oh, I have words like that, too. I thought I

By |2004-01-10T16:01:00+00:00January 10th, 2004|Legacy|Comments Off on AWAD

Cat Anxiety

Me: "Hello, K, I've lost Pattie's cat." K: "What? You ate Pattie's fat?" Me: "No, I lost her cat. I've been all over her apartment and I can't find the damned cat." K: "You're cat sitting?" Me: "Yeah. Cats don't get stuck behind things, do they?" K: "No. They only go into places they can

By |2004-01-09T03:47:00+00:00January 9th, 2004|Legacy|Comments Off on Cat Anxiety

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