She: “Should I be honest with job candidates and watch them run away, or lie and possibly get someone good?”
Me: “There are pluses and minuses to both. Eventually, you realize, you’ll have to come clean and level with the job candidate.”
She: “True, but not right away.”
Me: “Okay. You could offer them a sliding scale of reality:
1) Santa doesn’t exist
2) Santa doesn’t exist but the whole Easter Bunny thing is true or
3) Santa is dead. His bloated corpse will be waiting for you in your cubicle.”
She: “Oooooh. I like option 3.”
Me: “Do you want someone who could deal with that much reality on the first day?”
She: “Maybe not. Other options?”
Me: “You could pepper your interview process with those thought-provoking, situational questions.”
She: “Sure, sure. That’s been done for years.”
Me: “Yeah, but give those questions a gritty feel.”
She: “You have 10 projects waiting in your cube. All are politically charged, but are the darlings of competing SVP’s. Prioritize them.”
Me: “Grittier. You have 3 projects due tomorrow. Number one your Senior VP mentioned in passing to your boss as being cool. Number two is actually critical to the success of the organization and will be instrumental in the doors staying open another week. And number three is easy to accomplish and makes you look good. You don’t want to stay late tonight because Straight Eye for the Queer Guy is on the telly. What do you do?”
She: “Ooooo! I’d do number 3 and maybe number 1.”
Me: “Great, you’re hired!”
