DSW. The Gap. Anne Taylor. Tequila Roadhouse.

I’ve already received birthday greetings from them all. Happy Birthday, come and shop! Happy Birthday, come and drink! Hey, Child of August, we love you for having a birthday, come and give us your money!!!

My birthday isn’t for another three weeks, and I’m confronted with its impending certainty. *sigh* It’d be one thing if I were really looking forward to turning 35, but I’m not.

Now I have to deal with the “birthday greetings” of retail America. This monster needs to be contained.